10 Awesome Tote Bags for Moms, by Moms

My secret mom weapon of organization is tote bags :-)  I love having designated totes for all of my roles... my current diaper bag is a tote bag, and I have another bag containing things we need for taking the babies out to eat, one for taking to meetings or work days for my twin mom club's newsletter, one I can carry my blogging necessities in, and a bunch more for organizing travel (entertainment, road food, quick changes of clothes).

I also love supporting small businesses, so I've rounded up some of my favorite totes from online small businesses! Funny, clever, beautiful... and of course, super-practical!

Protect Your Identity (and I'm NOT talking about finances)

[Trigger warning: suicidal ideation]

What do you know about yourself? 

I'll bet most of you can tell me a few positive things that you are, things that you like about yourself. You're a hard worker, you're pretty, you're loyal or passionate or funny or you can really cut a rug. When you're having a rough day, or starting to lose sight of some of the nuances of who you are, you can count on these details to be true and good.  

I'm smart.  

This is the one good thing I've known about myself since I was very young.  Even when I also believed I was bad, lazy, messy, ugly, boring, nerdy, overly-emotional, not worth being friends with or dating... I knew I was smart. It was a good quality of mine I could cling to, and I built the bulk of my identity around that.   

But what do you do when that identity is called into question?

Revisiting My 30 by 30 List - I've Made Some Progress!

Do you guys remember when I shared a list of 30 things I wanted to accomplish in the 18 months or so that were left until I turned 30?  Right around six months have passed since I made that list, so I wanted to revisit it and share some of my progress with y'all!

6 Things My Dog Taught Me About Being a Mom

We had our wonderful dog, Charley, for six years before Abbie and Sam showed up, and like many families headed by infertile couples, he became like a child to us.  A lot of "fertiles" shook their heads at me when I would say things like that, telling me it's not the same and I would understand if I ever got to be a mother to a human child.  While I acknowledge that it's not the EXACT same, as a now mother of two human children, I can attest that there most certainly ARE a lot of similarities.  In fact, being Charley's momma prepared me in a lot of ways to be a good momma to Abbie and Sam. :-)

BarBABYdos: Where to Stay (Comparing Rosebank and Courtyard by Marriott)

When people email me to ask me questions about our experience with Barbados Fertility Centre and our time on the island, booking accommodations is almost always one of the topics they ask about.  So I figure, if so many people are asking about it, it must be blog post time :-)

BFC offers packages in which they will book your airfare and accommodations for you, even further reducing your potential stress level.  Of course, there is a reasonable upcharge for the convenience, and if the financial savings is one of the main reasons you are considering pursuing your fertility treatment in Barbados, you may want to avoid that extra money and book your own flights and hotel.  This is the route we took, and truthfully, it didn't add too much stress.  There are relatively few options for flights (only three airlines currently fly from the US to Barbados), and the Centre has a curated list of hotels in the area that they are happy to provide for you.  

While we obviously don't have experience with all of the hotels on the list, I can tell you about our experiences at two different properties - Rosebank and the Courtyard by Marriott - and give you some pros and cons of each to keep in mind as you make your decision. 

8 Magic Moves Mommas Master

When you're pregnant - or even thinking about getting pregnant - people are quick to tell you what a magic-filled time of your life pregnancy and parenting will be.  And they're completely correct!  In both super sincere and slightly sarcastic ways, mothers become magicians.  I thought about my daily repertoire of magic, then consulted some of my favorite fellow magicians - the fabulous parents in my twin mom club - and here are just a few of our many tricks:

The Abdominal Amplification  

Let's start at the very beginning... (a very good place to start.  Sorry, I'll stop with the lyrics now.) Our bellies get kind of ginormous.  Especially twin bellies.  As you're watching yours expand almost so quickly you can see it, you can't help but marvel at this super-cool magic trick you didn't even know you could do!

The Sedative Song 

You may have the world's second-worst singing voice (mine's the worst), but something about it still calms your baby.  Their reaction is almost trance-like, and I always picture that scene in The Little Mermaid when Ariel's voice is out of her body, swirling around toward Ursula's seashell necklace... except my voice seems to wrap around those tiny angry people and make their eyes glaze over and get very... very... heavy....

The Gibberish Decoder

When I hear a noise from the nursery, I can always tell you which baby it is, and 99% of the time, I can tell you what they want.  Their voices and needs have changed, but since they were a few days old, I've been able to translate like they are my second and third languages.  I'm much more fluent in Abbie and in Sam than I ever got in French... with eight years of study. And there's no textbook, dictionary, or tutor for these languages. Tell me THAT isn't magic! ;-)

The Medication Obscuration

Only by magic can we convince babies that the syringe of sickly sweet syrup they do NOT want to swallow is really an airplane they should open their mouths to let into the hangar.

The Auxiliary Appendage Acquisition

We can hold a squirming baby (or more), mix bottles, and (for many of us) keep an older child or even a pet from getting into trouble, all at the same time.  Each of those tasks require at least two arms... put a few of them together... magic!

The Perplexing Plaything Prestidigitation

In this trick, a toy that two kids are fighting over (or fighting with) suddenly disappears without a trace. It may or may not reappear at a later date ;-)

The Silent Slink

This is the ability to slip in and out of your sleeping babies' nursery to retrieve the cell phone charger you left there during their morning bottles.

The Tenacity Optimization

After a long day of being pooped on (figuratively and literally), of questioning and striving and loving and advocating... we go to bed exhausted, then wake up (usually too soon) and do it all again. Because we are magical creatures, and we love those little people so stinkin' much <3

What magic tricks did I miss? :-)  If you leave one in a comment, make sure I have a link to your blog if you have one... it may show up in a follow-up post down the road!

My Simple Spring Mom-iform (and a coupon code!)

Have I mentioned how I'm loving all of the spring colors and flowers in our back yard? :-)  The weather in Ohio is a little temperamental right now, so it's not necessarily feeling like spring every day, but it sure LOOKS like spring time! I'm gonna let you in on a little secret that could probably get my blogger cred revoked... I feel about the coming of spring pretty much the way everybody else feels about autumn ;-) It's fresh and soft and optimistic... and I can go barefoot more easily.

White and Gold Polka Dot Shirt: Kohl's (still see on clearance sometimes!)
Dark Peach Shorts: Kohl's (softest. shorts. ever!)
Shoes: circa 2004ish? And I can't even read the brand anymore.
Necklace: c/o The Vintage Honey Shop (Spring Daisy Ring)

This is my spring "mom-iform"... I keep it very simple.  I have a handful of skirts and pairs of shorts and several solid-colored or neutral tees.  I'd say all of my tops go with 3/4 of my bottoms, and all of my bottoms go with 3/4 of my tops.  I almost have to try to mismatch, haha! :-)  But neutrals and basics don't have to be boring!  Believe it or not, these fun peach shorts are really versatile - they look great with my white (or this white with polka dots), black, light blue, navy, and tan shirts! And I'd wear it with yellow if I had one... hm.  Maybe I need a yellow shirt. ;-)  I wear my favorite old (we're talking high school here, y'all), broken-in flats, and a Vintage Honey Shop necklace, and my mom-iform is complete :-)  

Each piece is deliberate but relaxed. Everything is interchangeable so when I get spit up on, I can change the dirty piece instead of the whole outfit.  All of my clothing is either loose or comfortably stretchy, allowing me to roll around on the floor, pick up Abbie and Sam, and bend and twist all day long. And my choice of jewelry entertains restless babies and soothes their poor teething gums :-)

Speaking of my Vintage Honey Shop teething necklaces, I have just been accepted as a brand rep and affiliate for their shop!  I've talked before about how much I love these necklaces, and I'm so excited that I get to offer my readers a coupon code for 10% off their orders!  And in addition to you saving 10%, I earn a little bit of money too... which will probably go back toward buying another necklace for myself ;-) So I SUPER appreciate you entering this code at checkout! :-) The code is:

alwayskatie

Tell me about your "uniform!"  Do you have a closet full of super-basic basics like I do?  Or do you like to mix it up a little more?  And which Vintage Honey Shop necklace do you neeeed in your life? :-)

Happy April, friends! 

Abbie and Sam at Nine Months

We got Abbie's and Sam's nine months pictures back this weekend, and I promptly melted in a puddle of momma :-)  We had soooo many great pictures that it was really tough to narrow it down to our favorites for Facebook, and then further for the blog :-)  

They turned nine months old on March 3, so they're almost 10 months old now.  

Right now, Abbie has two teeth and Sam still has none... Abbie's are SHARP!!  She was chewing on my finger today, bit a little too hard, and broke the skin.  

We JUST separated them into separate cribs at night, because Abbie has started to climb on Sam every chance she gets.

Sam is crawling quickly and lots of distance.  Abbie "army crawls," but doesn't crawl with her belly up in public.  We HAVE seen her doing it perfectly over the video monitor at night... it's like she's practicing before she shows off the new skill.  Little stinker ;-)

Sam goes from his belly to sitting by himself now... this milestone is a crazy one to me.  Just glance over and he's sitting tall and straight, and I didn't put him there!  So grown up!

They had their first chocolate this weekend... we decided that would be a fun little first for their Easter.  Each one had a tiny bit of a warm homemade chocolate chip cookie.  

Building a Legacy (#MotherhoodMonday, Motherhood Motivation)

When we were trying to have children, I used to daydream about the little things, the daily miracles and joys.  I was motivated by the desire to make a silly face and watch a gummy smile bloom, to explore how paint colors mix with a toddler, to braid a daughter's hair.  But I was also motivated by the idea of my legacy.

I alluded to this a little bit when I talked about the pressure of picking the perfect names for our twins... the idea that these names (but mostly these people) are forever.  I pray that Abbie and Sam will each find the great love of their life and have babies (hopefully more easily than we did), and that some of those babies will have babies and that our descendants are good people who do great things.  

Leaving a legacy is important. As a grad student, I was drawn to Erikson's stages of psychosocial development.  The seventh stage - middle adulthood - is all about making a difference and leaving a legacy, and for a person to successfully move on from that stage, they must feel they have accomplished this.  A legacy doesn't have to be through parenting... far from it.  I believe that Ethan's legacy is more far-reaching than my own, as he has directly influenced over a thousand students as a teacher and a professor... but for me, I have always imagined that my major legacy in following generations would be through my work as a mother.

So my motivation in mothering is to set in motion a cascade of good, loving, influential people who make differences in their own ways.  Sort of like the premise of the movie "Pay It Forward"... I can raise two good people who each will have their own legacy reaching multiple others, who will have their own legacies... I hope these legacies will be of compassion, strength, and dedication.  

Every day, I will try to model these characteristics for Abbie and Sam.  I will try to meet their changing needs, to help them become confident, whole, well-rounded adults who are excited about their own legacies, whatever those may be.  

PS: Please stop in and visit with the other #MotherhoodMonday blogger moms who have posted today!

• Lisa W. 
• Alexis 
• Lindsey 
• Farrah 
• Tiffany 
• Natasha 
• Heather 

Five Friday Favorites (March 11, 2016)

I enjoy reading what other bloggers have been loving, so I hope you'll enjoy my five favorite posts from the past week or so!

1. Elena at Beautiful Hope invited several other married bloggers and me to serve on a panel to answer questions submitted by engaged women.  The engaged ladies asked some really great questions, and I've been enjoying reading the wisdom of other married women!  The first question was about how NOT to be a "bridezilla," the second was about nurturing your relationship with your fiance while you're preoccupied with planning, and the third was about budgeting. 
2. Mattie's Makings featured me in last week's Mattie's Makings Instagram challenge! Super-honored! And using her hashtag has introduced me to a few lovely instagrammers and bloggers, which makes the blog world feel a little smaller and warmer :-) 
3. Chrystie at Living for Naptime shared a guest post by Jenny of Princess Turned Mom about the time she cried at Trader Joe's.  Can't say as I've experienced the exact scenario she describes... can't even say I've actually been to Trader Joe's (lol!)... but boy, did this post hit home.  The way she summed it up has really stuck with me: "This mommy business is literally the hardest job in the world and some days are good and some are really quite miserable. But just as a sick baby cries out for their mommy in the middle of the night so are we to cry out to our heavenly father for help. And that is what I did that day as I cried at Trader Joe’s.  'As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you.” -Isaiah 66:13'"  Thanks, Chrystie and Jenny, for encouraging this tired momma's heart this week!
4. My wonderful husband sent me this article about the conversation around C-sections by Jenni Naselli at Desiring God.  I love it!  I'm so tired of feeling judged for our birth story... I gave a vaginal birth a valiant effort, and don't appreciate hearing that if I'd done this, or tried that, or ignored the advice of my doctor, we could have had a "better" experience.  My kids and I are alive.  Pretty satisfied with my experience! 
5. And finally, my friend Brittany at Grace, Love, Life wrote a great post in modern terms about becoming the Proverbs 31 wife.  So many of  us know this passage, but the ideas don't feel particularly relevant to our modern life (I don't weave, and I think God is okay with that)... so what does the wife of noble character look like in 2016?  Very thought provoking post!

Thank you ladies for such great reading this week! 

What was the best thing you read this week? Paste links in the comments - I love reading and following other bloggers! :-)  Have a lovely weekend, y'all!